Faux Quotes

Here’s a fun challenge from Mental Floss: “Come up with a clever, witty, fake quote and attribute it to a notable person (real, mythological, fictitious, it’s up to you).” The most popular faux quote wins a free book of real quotes, and that’s just enough motivation for me to make up a few of these things.

“Atchoo, Brute.” – Julius Caesar, having caught a cold from his so-called friend

“Sonar, so good.” – dolphin

“First!” – Adam

“No one bothered to tell me the definition of ‘omnipotent’ until it was too late.” – Satan

“More glockenspiel!” – Brian Wilson

“Always cover up when it’s cold outside.” – Richard Nixon

100years Faux Quotes
as reported in The New York Times

May 28, 1908
WARMER TO-DAY.
And Yesterday the Warmest May 27 In 28 Years — 4 Die from Heat.

museum Faux Quotes
One clue whose answer consists of two rhyming words:

He’s the coolest character on Happy Days, and now he’s been cast in 3rd place metal. Let’s go to the park and check out the…

Highlight here for answer: [bronze Fonz]

museum Faux Quotes
Anteater Coolness

052808 Faux Quotes


quotopia Faux Quotes

The happiness which is lacking makes one think even the happiness one has unbearable.
Joseph Roux

shows Faux Quotes

EVERY DANG THURSDAY
with Matt the Electrician
8:00 PM
Flipnotics at the Triangle
4600 Guadalupe
AUSTIN, TX
(512) 380-0097
http://flipnotics.com
________________________________________________________________

WEDNESDAY, MAY 28, 2008
7:00 PM
Spike Gillespie’s Dick Monologues
Hyde Park Theater
AUSTIN, TX

http://dickmonologues.com

________________________________________________________________

FRIDAY, JUNE 20, 2008
9:00 PM
Matt the Electrician & Southpaw Jones
Anderson Fair
2007 Grant St. 77006
HOUSTON, TX
713.528.8576

http://andersonfair.com

Doors open at 8:00pm

Thank you, come again!
myspace.com/southpawjones
E-mail southpaw@southpawjones.com
©2008 Southpaw Jones. All rights reserved.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>