CRUELTY Track 2
Listen
Summer in the southland is rough on your car
Fluids evaporate while engines combust
The AC it broke in my Buick
So I called a mechanic I trust
He said, “Your AC runs on Freon man,
And nowadays that ain’t good news
‘Cause Freon’s been banned for environmental reasons
So I asked him, “Then what do you use?”
He said, “Researchers stumbled upon it
While developing flawless, permless curls.
They found something better than Freon
In the cruelty of teenage girls.
They pump it in from high schools all over
There’s a receptor in every locker door
And every heart that falls out of some young romantic
They scrape it right up off the floor
At first they were tapping the boys, too
To power some New England town
But the football team started sucking it up
And the army enlistments went way, way down
But you can still get a few seconds of coolness
Out of every cheerleader’s baton as it twirls
You can even drive through Texas in August
Thanks to the cruelty of teenage girls.
So, our drivers are saved from perspiration
By the cruelty of teenage girls
But fears of the night put me down on my knees
To pray for the rest of our world
I pray for resolution in foreign lands
I pray for redemption at home
But God interrupts as I say my amens
And tells me to leave him alone
He says, “The universe runs on the Freon system now
So talking to me does you no good.”
I said, “Isn’t Freon bad for the environment, though?”
He says, “The environment’s bad for the environment
If you think about it.”
Then he said, “Here, check out this burning bush
Chomp on this burning coal
Shut up
And let me enjoy retired life
Let me go fishing, let me get to know my wife
Let me drive my Buick as chilly air swirls
Thanks to the cruelty of teenage girls
Thank me for the cruelty of teenage girls
Thank Freon for the cruelty
The la la la la la la girls
© 2008 Southpaw Jones. All rights reserved.
